Whatever leadership training or other mentoring or coaching project we do with Kingmakers we always include appreciation. The theme is so universal to any human relationship, and in workplaces sometimes still not obvious. That’s why I was very happy to come across a book devoted entirely to this issue. This is “Glascology” by Milosz Brzezinski.
Lack of support vs. human development.
The promise on the cover states that with this book we will learn “How to positively influence others and increase our satisfaction in the process?”. And indeed. In the very first paragraphs, the author cites historical facts documenting that children in orphanages, hospitals and nursing homes deprived of warmth, smiles and kindness died or developed much worse. More light was shed on this correlation by studies that traced the connection between human physiology and emotionality: “Signals of support, love, a sense of community are received not only and exclusively by emotional centers in the brain, but also by the hypothalamus, among others, and are transmitted to the pituitary gland, which, in the absence of these signals, for some reason, stops producing growth hormones.” And maybe it’s not a good idea for me to start wondering now if my 160 cm height means anything ;). However, this is another reason to just be ruthless in appreciating people.
Cheers
The author also cites Eric Berne, who constructed an entire concept of human relations, which he called transactional analysis, and which is based on the assumption that every human being needs a so-called “transactional” relationship. strokes, or interactions (exchanging signals with others around you). If these strokes are about support, security or love, we become more productive. Is it related to the work environment? Well. Brzezinski believes that “not supporting people when we want to help them get tangible results is like not taking an oxygen cylinder on an expedition to Mount Everest.” Maybe it’s lighter in the backpack and for a while it goes faster. However, in a moment we find that every expedition supplied with oxygen is ahead of us.
Why stroke?
From the first part of the book we will learn why to stroke, if not for the sheer value of it. For example, to be more convincing. This is the easiest way to influence others. We need to deposit so we can withdraw later. Although according to the author, kindness is an “absolutely good” value and the most important skill that we should learn and practice all our lives. It turns out that this not only works well for others, but also for ourselves. By supporting others we are healthier and feel better. From a business perspective, it looks like appreciation, helps unleash people’s potential and makes them give more of themselves. On top of that, they are more satisfied with themselves and have more job satisfaction. So, leaders, if you are stingy with appreciation, not only are you shooting yourself in the foot with regard to team atmosphere and people’s well-being, but you will also fail to achieve good results. End of period.
How many strokes?
Trainees often ask us how many of these appreciations are needed. Especially when talking about corrective feedback. Leaders want to know the ratio of positive reinforcement to one behavioral correction. From “Glascology” we will learn (and there is a ratio that comes out of the research) that productivity increases if the ratio of instances when people feel pride, satisfaction and fulfillment to those in which they rather feel anger, guilt or embarrassment is 3:1. And that’s the bare minimum. Kingmakers are upping the ante when it comes to development, and we say that if an employee is to be not only productive, but still develop this ratio is 5:1.
What about criticism?
Immediately, I will probably hear from practitioners. After all, paying attention, disciplining, also works. I know, I did/do, I saw/see the results. That’s right. However, only in the short term. In “Glascology” we find a reference to research indicating that people who are praised, for what they get out of it, get a 71% increase in task performance. While those spellbound by disciplinary and motivational speeches do their best at first, but if they again do not receive appreciation, then the quality of the tasks performed drops dramatically.
How to appreciate?
Well, okay, say participants in Kingmakers training and development projects, we are already convinced of appreciation, but how to do it. Won’t it be artificial? Will it be reliable? Will it fit me? You will find the answers to these questions in the second part of “Glascology,” where you will learn about the power of compliments, ways such as “return” and many other ways of appreciation. You will also get such answers at our trainings, where we create opportunities to experience the power of appreciation on yourself. We also invite organizations that would like to anchor “strokology” in their organizational culture.
So far, all groups that have used this form of work with us have rated it very highly. They mainly emphasized practicality (real, current cases), the opportunity to learn and share experience in a group, and above all, NO EVALUATION, which supported openness and honesty in talking about their challenges and problems. If this form of work fits your needs – welcome!
If you want to know more contact us.
